THE STORM WITHIN

Sayuri is one of the silently brave ones. While she appears very sensitive and fragile deep within she knows she has her moments of heroic success dealing with things that may create havoc in her life. The only thing she is scared to deal with is heart break. She has dealt with it thrice in the past. And if you think that has made her stronger. It hasn't. In fact she has become more vulnerable but in a smart way.
Sayuri has been in this relationship for the last 4 years. The only love affair that has lasted for the longest. And how she joked about deserving an award for stability..She left her home to join her lover in the Capital city of her country where he resided. She fought circumstance's, convinced parents and herself to move cities ...A job in the capital was just a farce. Lover wasn't..Love is what brought her here. Live in relationships are certainly blasphemous in this country. but Sayuri chose to be with her lover under the same roof not because she loved him madly. But the thought of living under convenience and a home like surrounding was more over powering. After all this was the first time Sayuri had ever stepped out of her comfort zone.

Lover was madly in love. they both made silly mistakes, forgave, loved each other, made more mistakes, hurt each other, forgave each other, made life miserable followed by thousand promises and hundreds apologies. Which couple doesn't fight? Sayuri knew that her life was not very different from any other couple n love. but what made it different was the fact that she was physically abused. Not regularly. But in the last 4 years, Sayuri has been hit 6 times!...

It was definitely not a normal relationship. Sayuri lived in with her boyfriend. They did not believe in the same faith. Their upbringing was drastically different. He is 7 years elder to her. And like normal couples who share the same bed, They barely made Love!...
Strange as the thought is, Sayuri dreaded SEX more than anything else. Not that she didn't crave for it. But because she didn't like the way he touched her. His overpowering hand , his need to rush had made her feel so deprived of the touch that she longed. She yearned for a soft touch touch, for a gentle kiss, for all things much on bed. She wanted to go mad in his arms. But some how couldn't. She failed every time she faked orgasm. She had failed to get the right expression on her face. Anything and everything that happened between the two of them on the bed had soon become traumatising. to the extent that the last time she was hit by her lover was only because she had refused SEX that night.

Sayuri may not be a very romantic person at heart. Every time he hit her she forgave coz she knew that somewhere down the line she prompted him to raise his hand. But on a practical note. Physical abuse is the worst kind in love relationships. No one should raise a hand on someone they love. Sayuri does not have memories of being hit by her parents. Though she does recall being slapped by her father when she was in school when a classmates mother called to complain of a joke that she had cracked on her daughter.

Sayuri has just returned form an Out station trip that she had been to on work. She has returned home only to realise that her partner has gone away to his hometown for a couple of days to find some peace and solace. They were not in touch for sometime after he last hit her just couple of hours before she was about to leave for the Tour..

Close rational friends suggest that Sayuri takes a break. But she does not have the courage to do so. Reason: Her lover was the most affectionate, loving , highly indulging person. He took care of all her needs. So what if he didn't know how to please her on bed and raised his hand on her..The fact still remains that all his positive points fall flat and in vain goes he hit her. he slapped her, kicked her, pushed her in some random direction. Like always she will forgive him. Like always they will get back to normal. And like always they will fight someday and Sayuri will be slapped yet again.

Sayuri is ashamed to get away from this hurt. Reason you ask? Well she is worried of the society who was just waiting for the to of them to tie a knot. they were waiting Sayuri to get married. After all She will be all of 25 this year..

Agonizingly

Sayuri

BACK AND HOW

Yellow People!
Sayuri was out of Action from Blogger for a very long time. Blame it on all that she was busy doing.. Nothing basically.
So Sayuri has returned from back home and has comfortably adjusted to the work schedule without any cringe. Though she misses home and her father who is cooking for himself as Mum is away for her pilgrimage. And now that Sayuri is back in Action at work. she is only happy living life without regret.

There are so many things that happened to Sayuri back home. Some interesting. Some sad. Some really really funny..All will be told to you but in the form of small small posts so that Sayuri preserves the essence of the subject and does full justice with her story narration.

You know sometimes she seriously doesn't know what she is talking. like she has no clue about what she has written above. Well, SIGH! Such is life so vague and yet so clear...

Will write more.. Keep reading.. you better

Sayuri

GOING HOME

So in a couple of days Sayuri will be on her way back home. To the place she was born and brought up. The reason for this sojourn will be mom's pilgrimage to the Holy Place..Need to be home to help mum pack and leave for the Holy Place.
Going back home is not always happy for Sayuri. It is always a mixed feeling, While the joy of meeting family is imperative, the sorrow of all their pain and agony is what drives the world go nuts in life. When home, it is sad to see two unhappy people live with each other. Talking about parents here.
Though Sayuri wants to be home to be there for family for a couple of weeks. She is also a lil sad to leave her lover behind in the place she has now called home..The home away from home..

Sayuri has her plans in place for this trip. She wants to spend quality time at home, cook for family, and yeah do all things that she did all by herself when friends didn't interest her much..

So Long...

Sayuri

WELCOME ME!

Hello to all those who have stopped by. This is the First ever Post on this Blog. And since I do not expect someone to welcome me here before I venture in..

Here it is A BIG WARM WELCOME TO ME!..Hope I write all things that make sense. Well, at least I think I make sense with every word I utter. But never mind, In life I will always come across someone or the other who thinks otherwise..

Do I care really? Well, Maybe but I must take a chill pill..

I will be back soon. With much more sensible content..

Too Much Love

Sayuri